for s.b.

Hello, friends, fans, and people who google "cock bulge," "splash mountain boobs," and "Mary Steenburgen nude"! I'm back after a deboucherous, dignity-defying, delicious weekend.

After a trip to the graveyard (left) and to Arby's, we settled in peter's bed with turkey sandwiches, several cokes, and lots of beer to watch 6 episodes of The Shield from the season 1 set I bought just so I could loan it to people. Damn, have I mentioned how good The Shield is? You can't blame me for trying to get you to watch it, because right now we live in a society dominated by pop culture slang terms like vajayjay. When the New York Times writes a piece on vajayjays, it's time to take action.

If more people watched The Shield, the word for vagina in our lexicon would instead be "yammy," which is so much easier to say while raising an eyebrow. Sure, it's in the urban dictionary, but not enough people know about this and the many other dirty lines on The Shield that the FX Network lets slip through. According to the commentary on the infamous "ass fulla cum and back fulla shiv" episode, most of them are penned by Kurt Sutter, shown here as Margos Dezerian, shooting an associate. Would you rather be saying a word that guy popularized, or one that Oprah has told America is "paining" her? (Let me let you think about that one for a minute.) Sure, some people have caught on--Michael Chiklis reports still getting "sweet butter!" yelled at him on the sidewalk (I would link to the video on youtube, but fox pulled it down)--but it is now time for you to take the mantle and go buy the Shield DVDs (not that the writers will get any money for that). If you start watching now, you'll be able to catch up in time for the final season.

What else are you going to do with your TV?

The Bulge that Started It All

This is what happened:
Awhile back I posted about a British documentarian that looked like Mo Rocca.
Then I wrote about the episode of The Shield where Shane goes undercover as a cock fighter.
Then I added a link to a TMZ photo gallery of celebrity bulges.

And then, someone googled "mo rocca cock bulge" and my page came up. It was my best google hit ever.

So I wrote about it, and ever since then, Anterias has turned up as gay men and straight women google the bulges of their favorite actors. I've gotten Kevin Costner cock bulge, and, much to my delight, Michael Chiklis cock bulge no less than 4 times (though it may be the same person googling it over and over).

I wish I had a photo of either of these bulges, which, truth be told, are probably worth seeing if you're bored and horny and hanging out on the internet. But according to the Celebrity Nudity Database, which, I'm not even joking here, I discovered while doing legitimate research for my job one day, you'd have to go rent No Way Out and be fast with the pause button to Kevin's man parts pressing against his pants. And Michael Chiklis isn't even listed!

What I DO have is the kitty strangling scene from The Shield. And who doesn't want to see that?

Why Michael Chiklis is hot.

Just banish all memories of The Commish and watch this scene from The Shield where Vic gets it on with a Domestic Violence–Shelter Runner (what was her name again?).

I try to oblige

Since someone recently found my blog by typing "mo rocca cock bulge" into google, I thought I would try to give the reader(s) what she (they) want. This is the best I could find. It's kind of hard to tell, because he's wearing white pants, but I think if you hold your face close enough to the screen you can see it. Enjoy!